Away We Went

Ok, it's been a really long time since I've had a serious, air-gulping, body-wracking, puffy-eyed, sleeve-soaking cry. But then we went to see "Away We Go" at the Alamo tonight.

I should have known this particular movie would leave my soft parts open to brutal attack, considering it stars the awkwardly adorable John Krasinski and was written by the heartbreaking duo of staggering genius, Dave Eggers and Vendela Vida.

But you guys, I really didn't expect to dissolve into a puddle of snot and eyeball juice right there in public. Because here's the deal. Even though the movie had some really outlandish characters, and even though some of the dialogue was mildly overwrought, that shit felt so real to me I pretty much fell apart. I know there are lots of differences between my life and these fake movie characters, but damned if it didn't feel like they were me and Mike, except I'm not pregnant and Mike can't grow a beard.

If you don't know anything about this movie, the basic point of it is that this couple in their early thirties accidentally gets pregnant and goes on a quest to find the perfect place to live and raise a baby. They run into all different types of people on their journey, trying to figure out what type of parents they want to be and what city is the best fit for them. And you know what? Even though Mike and I are a few years off from having kids, in the back of our minds one of the major reasons we wanted to get out of LA and find somewhere that really feels like home to us is because one day we're going to be adding another person to our family, too. And we want to bring that new person to a place where we are truly able to be ourselves, and where they can easily figure out who they are.

I know this quest has been around since Bible-times, when people wandered entire, sandy continents for decades trying to find a better life. But something about "Away We Go" felt so fresh and relatable, it hit me just right. It felt good to be reminded that this experience of forming a bond with another person and then making a completely new path together is not unique. It's part of the human condition. And there's something scary and wonderful and satisfying about not knowing what's right, or else deciding to ignore what everyone else tells you is right, and then just making it up for yourself. Maybe that makes me sound like a douche, but sitting in the dark watching these two people find the place where they belonged made me so grateful not only for the amazing partner I've found, but also that we both had the courage to start down a new path together. It's not exactly easy, but it's so, so worth it.

So, go see "Away We Go." Because it's awesome. And it's totally not the chick flick I've made it out to be. In addition to many, many other very original and creative scenes of hilarity, John Krasinski yells "CUNT-SUCKER!" really loud in front of lots of people. You will laugh, you will cry, you will laugh and cry some more. You will sit in the bathroom stall sobbing for a few minutes afterward while the automatic toilet flushes three times. And you will love it.

Happy(?) Juneteenth

Periodically I will learn some charming fact about Texas history that kind of makes me go, "...REALLY?" Case in point: Juneteenth.

So, I found out that my client at work had the day off for a state holiday. This happens frequently, these random days off for mysterious "Texas holidays," such as Armadillo Day or BBQ Ribs Day. I didn't think much of it because of the constant holidayness, but then people at my office were wishing each other "happy Juneteenth" and discussing the Juneteenth meals they were planning to cook. So finally I got curious and asked one of my co-workers, "What the hell is Juneteenth?"

Co-worker: "Were you born in Texas?"

Me: "Nope."

Co-worker: "Ok, basically Texas is an asshole. When Abe Lincoln emancipated the slaves, Texas just decided not to tell them. For TWO AND A HALF YEARS. Finally, a couple years later on June 19th, Texas said, 'Oh yeah, this thing happened where you are kind of free.'"

Me: ... !

Co-worker: "I know, shitty, right?"

So now Texas celebrates(?) Juneteenth as Emancipation Day. From what I've been able to gather, Juneteenth celebration(?) consists of black people being like, "Eff you, effing white people" and white people throwing parties where they serve fried chicken and watermelon. Does that sound super racist? Yeah, I thought so, too. But I am for reals not making it up. Every now and then something like this reminds me that, yes, indeed I live in Texas.

Running Nose

So, I know I said I would talk about SXSW, but I ran a 10K this morning and I feel like I should bang out a post about that while I'm still all buzzy with runner's high.

I'd been hearing all week about the Statesman Capitol 10,000, a 10K race sponsored by one of the big newspapers here in Austin. I didn't really think too much about it, until I discovered yesterday that the starting line is just a few blocks from our house and also that this particular 10K involves costumes. Costumes? And running? Two of my great loves combined into one inexplicably weird and self-punishing hour of sweat and chafing? Helllllll yeah!

I did a little more research and learned that the Cap 10K is the largest 10K in Texas, and that last year more than 18,000 people ran it. It's one of the official markers to the beginning of spring in Austin. I was planning on running 6 or so miles today anyway, so at 6:32pm yesterday I said, "Let's do this thing!" And then I ate some ravioli, because I figured carbs were appropriate in this instance.

I decided I didn't have enough time to prepare a proper costume, so this morning I just put on some regular old running clothes, made myself a smoothie and biked over to the starting line. There was a giant Sea of People at the starting line, just south of the Congress Ave. bridge over Town Lake. Lots of people were wearing capes, a few were dressed as Easter bunnies, and some just had funny t-shirts, like a girl I saw whose shirt said, "Race official - do not pass."

Something weird always happens to me when I'm lined up for the start of a huge race like that. Something about the combined energy and excitement and nervousness of those many thousands of people overwhelms me, and I feel the need to burst into tears and sob like it's an episode of "Extreme Home Makeover" and I've got PMS. Isn't that weird? Like, I'm so amped up to be part of a huge group of people doing something good for their bodies, all in really great moods, all yelling encouragement to each other, and I get really emotional. Do I sound like a huge freaking hippie or WHAT.

Anyway, the starting gun went off and the Sea of People began to ripple forward. From then on for as far as I could see it was just a solid mass of bouncing heads and t-shirts. It is such a gorgeous day and there were so many fun costumes and bands playing along the way, I ran with a huge, goofy grin for the entire 6.2 miles. There were some really stellar costumes, but I had two favorites. One guy was dressed in a cardboard box he'd painted to look like an electronic road sign that said "Caution! Zombies ahead!" and his friend was dressed as a zombie. (This is now an inside joke amongst the entire city of Austin. I've posted on it before but refer you to Austinist if you haven't seen the photos.)

But by far my favorite costume was a woman who was wearing a giant nose, like in those gross Sudafed commercials where the people are just huge, talking noses with legs. It covered her entire body from her head to about her knees, and on the back it said "Running Nose." A pun-related costume at a running event. .......!

!

I finished the race really strong, even though all that smiling slowed me down a little bit. Afterwards I treated myself to two breakfast tacos and a latte, which I enjoyed out on the front porch because it's such a beautiful day. And now I'm going to shower and get right back outside to enjoy the 75 degree weather and blue skies.

As Mike said to me the other day, "I don't think the weather's going to be nice for too much longer. I think that Austin heat we've been hearing about is on its way." I said, "I know, it feels like Sunday." He looked at me kind of confused-like, and I said, "You know, it feels really awesome and perfect right now, but in the back of your mind you know something bad is coming soon."

But for now I'm in love with spring and running and costumes and puns and AUSTIN! Yay!

All Hail Free Beer

This was at the Aussie BBQ last Friday during South by Southwest (or SXSW. Or South by, in local lingo.) More to come soon, but for now I am still recovering from fun overload brought on by SXSW, St. Patty's Day and March Madness all happening at once. One thing I learned last week: I am certifiably old.

Happy St. Pickles Day!

Mr. Pickles sometimes gets his holidays confused. He'll probably be drinking Guinness on Cinco de Mayo.

Mas cerveza, por favor!

My Texas Passport Might Be Revoked

I've been delinquent! I know. In my first week as a full-time employee at the marketing agency I ate three square meals a day at my desk, plus second dinner around 1 or 2am before finally going home. Funny that they waited until I was no longer on hourly pay before asking me to keep speed-tweaker-lawyer's hours. The following week I didn't have energy for anything but re-runs of "My Super Sweet Sixteen," and that was just because I didn't have the mental wherewithal to press "guide" and see what else was on.

THEN, last weekend we went to upstate New York for my future-step-sister-in-law's baby shower, which was lovely, if not overly hyphenated. We just happened to have booked our return flight to coincide with the worst storm of the year, resulting in one canceled flight and several other delayed ones before we finally were back in Austin and drooling on our pillows. That's my way of making excuses for abandoning the blog for a little while.

Sadly, while we were up in yankee territory, I seriously set myself back in terms of Texas enculturation. I missed Texas Independence Day.

Ha! Texas Independence Day, that can't possible be a big deal, right? I mean, is it even a real thing, or is it made up, like Arbor Day? If you don't know anything else about Texas, you should know that Texas is very excited about... Texas. And Texas is very into the fact that for nearly a decade it was its own independent republic. So, in fact, March 2 -- the day Texas declared independence from Mexico -- is like a high holy day here. State employees have the day off. People throw parties and play hold 'em. There are chili cook-offs and period costumes. For. Reals.

Texans' pride in the unique culture and lore of their state is endlessly fascinating to me; I don't think the same type of allegiance exists in any other state.

In my research before moving here, I read "Kinky Friedman's Guide to Texas Etiquette - or - How to Get to Heaven or Hell Without Going Through Dallas-Fort Worth." Kinky is a country musician/politician/writer/cowboy and, most importantly, a Texan. He is kind of like a modern-day Mark Twain, if Mark Twain were Jewish and BFFs with Willie Nelson. Anyway, his book was full of useful information such as "things you would never hear a real Texan say" -- for example, "Duct tape won't fix that" or "You can't feed that to the dog." (Mike pointed out that real Texans also probably wouldn't say, "I just read this book on Texas etiquette..." Meh.)

I learned a lot of valuable information from this book, including the meaning of the "Yellow Rose of Texas." The final battle of the Texas Revolution against Mexico was the Battle of San Jacinto -- a last stand between the Mexican army led by Santa Anna and the Texican army led by Sam Houston. It seems Santa Anna had a penchant for lovely mulatto ladies (bow chicka bow bow!). Sam Houston supposedly sent a hottie virgin slave named Emily Morgan to distract Santa Anna with her feminine wiles while the Texican Army psyched themselves up to attack. The battle forced the Mexicans to retreat and gave Texas its freedom. Since Ms. Morgan traded her flower for Texas' independence, she's forever known as "The Yellow Rose of Texas." Turns out the best way to defeat your enemy is sometimes with his own... bayonette.

Of course I'm not in favor of pimping out ladies for any reason, but I do think it's an interesting story. Way racier than gardening, which is what I thought the phrase referred to. Anyway, happy belated Texas Independence Day, y'all!

Bird Watching

On Thursday night, Mike and I had a date to go see one of our favorite musicians, Andrew Bird. We bought the tickets months ago, while we were still living in LA, so it was the ultimate in delayed gratification when the night finally came. He was playing at the Paramount Theatre here in Austin, a kind of local landmark that was built in the early 1900s and is absolutely beeeautiful. Walking up, we knew we were in the right place because of all the awkward people in complicated outfits standing outside -- Andrew Bird is one of those musicians that attracts the hipster types.

I frequently discover a new favorite band by going to see someone I like and falling in love with the opening act. In fact, this is how we found Mr. Bird -- he opened for The Decembrists at the Hollywood Bowl last summer. Continuing the good music domino effect, I found the Bird's opener, Lonely Dear, to be thoroughly delightful.

Mike and I spent a good while debating whether or not the lead singer had an accent; it was so very nearly American that we thought maybe we were imagining it. When he admitted to being from Sweden, we sort of smacked our foreheads and said, "Of course!" I rarely pay attention to what a Swedish person is saying because I'm too focused on trying to decide what/if their accent is.

Anyway, they were lovely. I especially enjoyed one song where they had the entire theater sing back-up "da da da da da". It reminded me of my Bible camp days, sitting around the campfire and tacking my little voice onto the big, floating chorus. Except this crowd was really more "drunk and high" than "Deep and Wide."

Andrew Bird himself was straight out of a Tim Burton movie, all long and lanky and Jack the Skeleton King-ish. He was surrounded by freakishly large grammophone-looking dealybobs and whirlygigs. He played the entire show completely solo, but he sounded like an orchestra. He'd record himself playing one instrument, loop it, and then layer other stuff over it. He was constantly tapping pedals with his feet and swapping instruments and whistling and generally one-man-banding like a pro. It must take a superhuman amount of coordination -- I can't even change the radio station while I'm driving without veering into the next lane.

AND Y'ALL! What did he bring out at the beginning of the show for good luck? Guess! Can you guess? It was....

....a GIANT SOCK MONKEY! Some woman in Toronto made a giant sock monkey in his likeness, complete with skinny tie and violin case. He said, "I know it's silly, but you bring it to a couple of shows, they end up being good, and then you can't go on without it." !!!

In fact, there was a lot of sock talk. Early on, he kicked off his shoes for greater ease of pedal-tapping. He looked down and said, "Oh, my new horse socks. You see, there are little horses all over them. It's playful, you know. Like when your ninth grade math teacher would wear crazy ties. It's like that, for socks." Hipsters eat this kind of banter up. (Actually, so do I.)

I can say with no hesitation that Andrew Bird is the first person on planet Earth to make the violin cool. You will be hard pressed to name someone else who plays the violin and is not an overachieving nerd. (Sorry nerds.) He has total command of that instrument and could probably be first chair of any of the world's great orchestras if he weren't so twitchy. But instead he's a super cool, sock-monkey lovin' one-man orchestra, sometimes flipping that violin around and going ukelele style all over it.

I loved every minute of that show, even though I was occasionally preoccupied by his freakish coordination. For those of you in LA who want to do some Bird watching this week, he'll be at The Orpheum this Wednesday the 18th. Start trolling Craig's List, I think it may be sold out.